>Inspiring Your Authentic Week

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Inspiring Your Authentic Week
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It all comes back to confidence

Posted: 01 Jun 2009 12:24 AM PDT

I define personal authenticity as knowing who you are and having to the courage to be it in all situations without fear or compromise.

This is not always easy.

In “Authentic – how to make a living by being yourself” I wrote about a “dysfunctionality epidemic” where all sorts of damaging and negative behaviours can be traced back to individual insecurity.

At school most of us learn how to read and write and the capital cities of the world, but we learn precious little about ourselves or psychology. What we do learn we mostly learn in the playground.

1 – Don’t stand out.
2 – Don’t have an opinion
3 – Defer to anyone who seems physically or emotionally stronger
4 – You are not special

Of course we are not all equally affected by these lessons. How they affect us will depend on our underlying character, our appearance, support from friends and parents, the school we are at and so on. But most of us will, at least, recognise these lessons.

These lessons play out in a variety of ways in adult life, but always based in insecurity. Some will compensate for their insecurity by bullying and demeaning others in order to look better themselves. Some will seek to remain invisible by saying and doing as little as possible. Some will always try to say what they think other people want to hear – never expressing their true opinion. Some will be permanently defensive, taking everything as a personal attack. Some will just do what they are told even if it goes directly against their beliefs.

The global consequences of these childhood lessons are significant. Many cases of crime, violence, abuse and even war can be traced back to lessons learned in the playground. Even if the results are not so extreme they can play out in unfulfilled lives and unfulfilled potential.

While we are living in this insecure world it is difficult to recognise it, because we don’t know any different. It has been our life. How would we know that different is possible. Even if we can see the potential the journey can look terrifying and immensely challenging.

If you recognise any of these experiences in your own life let me assure you that the journey is more than worthwhile – it is essential. The discovery that their can be emotional peace, that there can be love, there can be fulfilment is liberating, empowering and inspiring.

If you recognise these fears in others you can help to reverse the lessons of the playground with praise, generosity and love.

The day that enough people in the world have the confidence to authentically be themselves is the the day that there is no more war, no more crime, no more violence, no more corruption.

We can all contribute to making it happen.

If you want some help in your authentic journey give me a call.

I am redefining my businesses – getting more clear, more authentic about who I am and what I do. www.neilcrofts.com has become the focus for my authentic business consultancy and coaching business. www.authenticis.com is evolving into a matchmaking website that will help authentic businesses and individuals find each other.

We are looking for associate consultants to join Authenticis and be trained in the authentic transformation tools – for more details visit the authenticis 2.0 page on www.authenticis.com

With love


Neil Crofts
Neil Crofts
authentic business

+44 (0)7775 658534
Skype – neilcrofts

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About Neil Crofts

Writer, coach and consultant on authentic business and authentic leadership. Neil has inspired and motivated hundreds organisations and thousands of individuals to their highest potential. Neil has written three published books and numerous e-books. Neil is a coach, facilitator and consultant helping people and businesses find their authentic purpose and use it to inspire and motivate them to be everything that they can be. Neil has raced cars, been self-employed, run a company and sold it, been employed by large companies, experienced growth and contraction at the heart of the dotcom boom, tried changing companies from the inside and from the outside as European Head of Strategy at internet consultancy/rock band Razorfish. Neil has been independent for over 10 years and delivered his Authentic Leadership message to a diverse range of business audiences including people at BP, Shell, Microsoft, Kraft Foods, MSN, Jamie Oliver, South Gloucestershire Council, National Blood Transfusion Service, KaosPilots Business School, Fashion company By Malene Birger, German technology company Eleven.
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